The Art of Wing Woman

This marks my first post of 2011, and I’m only twenty one days late! I’m going to spare you the ridiculous excuses and just say I’m a lazy so and so. Sorry!

When I get to January, I tend to start making an inventory of my accomplishments from the year gone by. It’s just a short list of goals I have achieved or skills that I’ve picked up so that I can make some realistic resolutions. When the big obvious ones are already down, I start digging for smaller less monumental things. That’s when I discovered I had mastered a true art: the art of wing woman.

I first learned what a wing woman was at a teen night club in New York (I had snuck out to be there..but that’s another story entirely!). My friends would be dancing and guys would come up behind them for a boogie. They couldn’t get a good look at who was approaching and they’d look over to me to get my reaction. Smile and nod meant, yea, he’s cute, continue with the dancing, frown and head shake meant, Nah, he wouldn’t be your type! There was a lot of trust involved in this scenario and that level of trust still exists on the wing woman front today.

Being part of a couple on a group night out is generally great. You have someone to dance with, someone to get you a drink at the bar and someone to hail a cab at the end of the night – all without the sleazy consequences of a random score. But what happens when you’re out with lots of single people?

Well this happened very recently to me and I noticed my wing woman skills were not only put to the test, but were extremely successful. I was able to provide the following to my single and ready to mingle peers:

1. Suggestions as to where the optimal places to dance were – based on the surrounding talent, if you will

2. Minor adjustments to hair and makeup (not easy in a steamy night club bathroom…)

3. chewing gum at the ready

4. I have been known to dance ridiculously, all in the name of making my friend look way cooler, of course.

5. The ability to sense when it’s time for me to get lost!

Do I think of myself as a modern day Yenta? Not quite – but at least I can be of assistance in some way.

The only downside to the whole thing is seeing your friends all successfully pull and realising you’re all alone for the long walk home. Thank god your other half is there, waiting to share your bag of chips!

The ultimate wingmen

 

Goin’ to the Chapel…

Weddings are great craic. I learned this first hand last weekend when Conor’s friend from work got married at Dunboyne Castle, County Meath.

Before that wedding, the last one I had gone to was eight years ago! It was my brother’s wedding (he’s a good bit older than me) and I was the Maid of Honour at 16. To start off with, I was self conscious in a figure hugging dress (I was a size 8 at the time, oh what I’d give to be able to wear that dress now!) I also couldn’t drink. On the craic scale it was a mere 7.

However, grownup weddings – ones where you’re a guest – are excellent! I was pretty nervous as I had never met any of Conor’s work friends before. Fortunately, our table was a good mix of very interesting people from all different professions, the food was scrumptious, the wine was flowing and the dance floor was free for the taking. The band played lots of soul music – and a bit of Stevie Wonder (one of my faves!) which forced Conor onto the dance floor. I’m very lucky and he is quite the mover!

The only downside for me was the Church. I realise that for some people, getting married with a priest and some lovely bible readings is the only way to do things – but its definitely not for me. Now my wedding day is a long way off – but I’m pretty sure I will not have my wedding in a church. For starters, the whole congregation wasn’t arsed answering the responses. The priest was pretty much saying them himself! Secondly, did those lovely bible readings mean anything to the bride and groom? If so, brilliant. If not – then what’s the point? I’d be much happier if my friends and family read meaningful prose or poetry than the same old passage from St. Paul’s Letter to the Corinthians.

I’d much prefer my wedding to be in a place that means something for me and my beloved. The ceremony should include everyone and be accessible for all our friends and family. And most importantly, it should reflect the journey we’re about to go on.

Anywho – that’s all a bit heavy! The night ended well, with my very ghetto dancing to “Empire State of Mind”. Yes you read that correctly: ghetto. Everytime that song comes on, especially after a few drinks – I think its being played for me and only me. I feel like everyone in the room knows I’m from New York – and therefore I must dance accordingly. *Puts face in hands* When will I learn eh?

Unfortunately, I have no photos of the day – but here’s what I wore:

Love Warehouse at this time of year!

I was going to pop up some lovely wedding-esque photos to give the right atmosphere – but there’s no better place than Leo Doyle Photography! (Did I mention my Dad is a photographer?) His website’s being updated at the moment – but you get the idea!

 

The Name Game

So here’s a life lesson we can all benefit from:

If you’re going to write love letters or a diary…you better be damn sure you won’t become famous because all that ranting, agonising, confessing and gushing will come back at some later time and tarnish your rep.

FACT.

Hey, I’m all for a little celebrity-perving but there are some things you just don’t want to know.

Case in point: Richard Burton’s love letters to Elizabeth Taylor are going to be published in Vanity Fare. Yes, aww it’s Cleopatra and Mark Antony and yes, they’re one of the most legendary Hollywood couples of all time…but did we really need to know Burton called his beloved, “Twit Twaddle” and “Scrupel shrumpilstilskin”?!

I would’ve been happy just thinking they called each other, “daaaaahhhlinggg” to be honest.

In fact I think knowing that much information about a great couple has kind of ruined them for me. Can you imagine if we knew other epic couples’ intimate pet names?

Romeo: Oh Juliet, my little blushing chipmunk!
Juliet: Why if it isn’t my gorgeous pumpkin schmunkin!

RUINED.

John: Let’s stay in bed for the weekend my cosmic plum bottom!
Yoko: Good idea, hairy love monkey!

RUINED.

As you can see…pet names are a bit of a contentious issue with me.

At the moment, I loathe them. I cringe each time I hear someone say baby, honey, sweetie etc etc. One classic television moment comes to mind straight away:

But I didn’t always feel nauseous at the mention of a pet name…I guess years of watching Chick Flicks and American television had programmed me to think that calling your loved one by a sickeningly sweet (and vomit-worthy) name was a normal practice. As a result, I am horribly ashamed to admit that I have used two doozies in particular.

- Freshman year of high school boyfriend was referred to as “Tiger”. eughh
- Junior year of high school boyfriend (and Army Reserves type) referred to as “Captain Combat Boots”. vomit

Now that I’ve made your flesh crawl aren’t you glad I’ve seen the error of my ways?!
My current beloved is only ever known by his first and last name and that’s the way it’ll stay.

Do you believe in Love?

I am super excited about this movie!

Thanks to LeLove for posting the trailer

Is Love Blind?

That very question was asked on Monday when two people met for the very first time at the altar! South East radio station, Beat 102-103 launched a competition entitled “Two Strangers and a Wedding” in which brides and grooms were shortlisted by listeners and had contact only over the airwaves. The chosen bride, known only as “Lady” and her groom called, “Batman” were part of what the radio station called, a social experiment and “possibly the greatest love story ever told”.

The wedding itself was completely sponsored and held in a Hotel in Kilkenny. The couple were promised a two week honeymoon in Portugal and a year of rent-free living, should they decide to fully legitimize the wedding by June 6th.

Bebhinn O’Keeffe and Alan Healy are as ‘newlyweds’ as it gets

As crazy as this whole concept sounds – it isn’t the first time Two Strangers and a Wedding has been attempted. In fact, it was done on 95.5 WPLJ (where I worked last Summer) in 2006, when the couple stayed together for just 6 months before divorcing. It was also done on Dublin’s 98fm and the couple is still together and has a child!

All through Beat’s competiton the word “genuine” has been used a million times. I’m sure the couple involved are totally up for meeting this new person and giving love a go – but it seems like an elaborate PR scheme on the part of Beat 102-103 to me!

Is love blind? I guess only time will tell!

Cardboard Love (in a digital world)

To love…

To love is good, too: love being difficult.
For one human being to love another: that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation.
For this reason young people, who are beginners in everything, cannot yet know love: they have to learn it.
With their whole being, with all their forces, gathered close about their lonely, timid, upward-beating heart, they must learn to love.
But learning-time is always a long, secluded time, and so loving, for a long while ahead and far on into life, is–solitude, intensified and deepened loneness for him who loves.
Love is at first not anything that means merging, giving over, and uniting with another (for what would a union be of something unclarified and unfinished, still subordinate–?), it is a high inducement to the individual to ripen, to become something in himself for another’s sake, it is a great exacting claim upon him, something that chooses him out and calls him to vast things.

- Rainer Maria Reilke “Letters to a Young Poet”
(one of my fave little books)

There’s no such thing as a grown-up

Love this.

This makes me melt…

I’ve always loved this song – but I never realised how sweet the video is!

Fuzziness.

The Dating Game

I doubt I’m the only woman to have ever watched “The Notebook”, “When Harry Met Sally” or any other number of chick flicks and wished. Hoped to be swept away in crazy, insane and breath-taking love. You know the scenes I’m talking about. The moment one realises that perhaps it HAS all been a big misunderstanding – and that you ARE in fact meant to be together, even if you are standing out in the snow, in your underwear a’la Bridget Jones.

Are these fluffy moments confined only to the movies?

Having been a “relationship” girl for the past five or six years, I decided to break free of the ideas that held me and embark on a new, single adventure. I say this like it was a choice of mine; it probably wasnt. But in hindsight, it has, and still is teaching me lots of things.

Question: Is the dating game all it’s cracked up to be?

Well lets see, first dates are – TERRIFYING. At first it seems like a brilliant idea. He’s hot, you get along well and now you’ve agreed to meet up somewhere. For the entire time you’re travelling to meet the person in this pre-decided date location you feel like you need to get sick. The idea of cancelling (no matter how amazing the person is) always surfaces. This first date is awkward – and if you’re like me – you’ll chatter and chatter in order to make sure things dont get MORE awkward. You make it through to the end of the evening and unless you’re tipsy – there’s the “goodbye scenario”. Do you kiss goodbye? Set another date? Text to say thanks? All of these questions float around in your brain. If you’re tipsy, your liable to just go for the kiss, the next date and the text. Good for you!

So then there’s dating more than one person. You’re “playing the field”, “young and keeping your options open” and “having fun with different people”. At first its like “ooh, lookat all my choices”! You feel kind of proud of yourself and genuinely like going out with interesting guys who seem to be interested in you.

To my attatched friends, this idea seemed INGENIOUS. One friend even said “wow Suz, your life rocks right now!” They liked the idea that I was having fun, but not tied down to any one person.

However, is this really as great as it seems? I’m not convinced. Sure, the attention is brilliant – but are you cancelling out your chances of actually feeling somethings strongly for one of these guys?! What if you keep dating different people and never again feel the desire to be swept up in a Casablanca-esque romance?! Can we lose our drive to find the one??

So here I am. Twenty-one. Single and having fun. But where’s my Mr. Darcy? I guess you can’t teach an old dog new tricks afterall.